Seed (2007)

Sentenced to death.
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Seed - Uwe Boll

Having heard nothing but condemnation for the work of Uwe Boll and being uninitiated in his perception of art, Seed was quite an unpleasantly shocking yet pleasantly disturbing surprise. There is no doubt that this movie was created just to inspire media hysteria and if the media cared about the work of Uwe Boll it is a certainty that there would have been an uproar. The movie begins with some contemptible animal cruelty footage from PETA to "highlight the human sickness", there are plenty of ways to highlight human sickness without going to the lengths of showing where Jennifer Lopez obtains her mink coats from (apparently) and this is obviously an attempt to be controversial and cover it up with a moralistic anecdote. While personally I feel that this footage is unnecessarily horrific for the opening credits of a movie it definitely creates a disturbing vibe from the offset and in a way I have to admire that Uwe Boll is willing to go this far to create an unsettling introduction to the life of Max Seed and prepare the viewer for the cruelty that ensues. I'll move on now before I start to sound like a tree-hugging whale-kisser.

The movie is nothing original and is about as brain taxing as starting a crossword book on the last page and working towards the front, the intention is just to shock and upset the viewer and graphically explore a number of taboo horror concepts with the subtlety of Bruce Banners leaked night-vision "angry sex" videotape. PETA footage aside... excessively violent baby fatalities, cruelly time-lapse recorded forced natural deaths and slow hammer head-splattification of the elderly are bound to cause a stir even if some low tech CGI is involved. Takashi Miike is renowned for pushing boundaries and exploring unthinkable horror concepts but don't expect the same levels of creativity from Uwe Boll and Seed, just expect to appalled by the insensitivity applied to exploit cruelty for cruelties sake.. which isn't necessarily a bad thing if you like your horror to shock.

Max Seed (Will Sanderson) is your typical eight foot tall, mask-wearing brick shithouse next door who hides a dark secret... he has killed 666 people over the last six years and he's on the loose. The police manage to get some of Seed's time-lapse home movies of animal and people living, dying and decomposing in a cellar and trace the origins of the tape to Max Seed's heavily booby trapped home, where, after the loss of his buddies, Detective Matt Bishop (Michael Paré) captures Seed. Seed is sentenced to the humane equivalent of dropping the toaster in the bath and refusing a last meal and a priest (whereas I'd have requested a last meal of a priest) he trundles off to the electric throne to have a moist (and probably itchy) sponge and 15,000 volts applied to his head. Luckily for Seed there is a local by law stating that if the executionee survived said 15,000 volts for 45 seconds three times in a row they win a caravan, a "blankety-blank cheque book and pen" and are allowed to go free. Max Seed, being harder than Han Solo re-carbonited with a naked Leia and her clone sandwiching him, survives... but they decide to bury him anyway.

The first thing every law-student should learn is that if you bury a survivor of the "three strikes" law then they should have a bullet applied to the brain before burial or they obtain super human powers and will avenge themselves by killing your family, possibly your pets and finally you. The local law enforcement obviously stayed home and smoked pot when the all important lecture took place and Seed unburies himself and exacts his revenge.

Seed ends in a way that mainstream horror rarely dares to do and apparently the inspiration for this movie was the lack of real disturbance that the "gorno" movies such as Hostel at the time claimed to have. With the inability to compare this with any other Boll movies at the moment and just comparing to movies that make similar claims of disturbance, Seed definitely provokes a feeling of dirtiness after having viewed it and despite having got to the end a few times having not really grasped much concept of a storyline there is definitely an emotional response registered. If you are a devout Boll hater, renounce anything containing CGI and refuse to give this movie any of your valuable time please watch the hammer scene.... just for comic relief.
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